18 steps to feeling like a cog in a very large and proportionately stupid machine

1. receive series of emails with course schedules and rotations attached to them.

2. download these to desktop.

3. receive email with link to plan of study forms.  search through list of ALL MA, MFA, and PhD forms until you find the correct one.

4. download it to desktop.

5. open form, discover it is in rich text format.  attempt to print.  discover that it prints at a third the size of a normal page.

6. fill out tiny form, using documents from #1.

7.  discuss tiny form with colleagues, become confused, look up degree requirements, email program director, become less confused.

8. take tiny form to advisor to be signed.

9. receive email guiding you to a link to an annual review form.  lose that email.

10. find the site yourself (same as previous form site), download review form to desktop.

11.  fill out form.  notice similarity to first form.  speculate as to why they are two forms instead of one.

12. quit filling out form.  attempt to e-file taxes.  more forms.  fail. 

13. pay 35 dollars to have tax company fill out the state return for you after you cry while reading the virginia government website.  do not regret this decision.

14. return to 2nd form.  fill out.  puzzle over narrative section asking you to describe what you've achieved this year.  bullshit heavily.

15. email form to advisor who signed the tiny form only a week ago.  

16. receive reminder that your thesis declaration form is due in another week.  recall that you described your thesis once already, on form 2, and were asked for your thesis director on form 1 [aka tiny form].

17. use form 2 to fill out form 3.  neglect all schoolwork to accomplish this task. 

18. spend 20-30 percent of all social encounters for the next week describing the forms, the filling out of forms, the redundancy of forms, and thus perpetuate the forminess of your life.